27 December 2011

Merry fucking bullshit day to you too

It's that wonderful time of year, you know when everyone is told to "cheer up, it's xmas"
told to not be a "scrooge"
told that because you don't join in, you are a "bah humbug"
Well fuck you and your false birthday of dead Jewish martyr/prophet.
Fuck you and your excessive eating, drinking and partying. If I was Jewish, Jehovah Witness, Muslim, Hindu or any other religion than Christian it would be frowned upon to say such things to me.
I am a scientist, I believe in quantum physics, I'm a Jedi. Have some fucking respect and stop expecting me to join in with your annual season of stupidity and vast stomach churning over consumption of Chinese made SHIT that will be out of date in four weeks time and food imported from all over the world and eating birds that quite a lot of people don't actually like the taste of, but eat anyway, because it's fucking tradition.

I used to like December when I was younger. I didn't understand any more than the fact I would get fantastic presents and I would empty my bank account to give presents that although I put a lot of thought in to them, frankly, everyone I gave them to, could have bought them anyway, if they wanted to, but probably didn't want, so wouldn't have.
Now I understand a lot more about the silly season I choose not to be a part of it.

Unfortunately, it's forced upon us. I endured a works xmas lunch, an overpriced meal in an overpriced pub for an underwhelming meal. I justified it only because it fell on the winter solstice day, which I do sort of celebrate because, obviously, the days starting to get longer again, is worth a drink at least.

What has all this got to do with Varekai and boats? Near to fuck all, but I needed to get it off my chest.
24, 25, 26 December was spent alone, on Varekai and in the club house sewing. I managed to put 5 new windows into two different motorboat canopies. Two new zips and some patch work.
My family are all abroad in the sun of Lanza-grotty.

remarkably peaceful, with every cunt away eating fat bastard meals and sleeping. Leaves the rest of the world free for the minority of us who aren't doing that.

14 December 2011

Join the club

My canvas work has taken off far more than I could have imagined.
I'm getting more and more ambitious with each creation, initially trying to keep them small, the latest one is simply impossible to finish within Varekai. I managed to stitch the main seam down the middle amazingly inside the boat, but now to adjust the edges to curve and fit the customers boat and add the windows I really desperately needed a nice floor to lay it out on.
There was only one thing for it. I was proposed to join the North Fambridge yacht club.
The people there are friendly and not too stuffy like some yacht clubs I perceive to be and they are happy for me to use the floor of the club house. And the tables. And the electricity that is coin operated.
What a marvelous stroke of luck that they are so friendly and accommodating.
So the boom tent has almost done in the pic. Just needs a few fittings and then er, fitting.

06 December 2011

Go directly to jail, do not pass Go, do not collect £200

Standing there thinking, brrr, it's gone all cold. I realised the electricity had gone off. I poked my head out of the hatch and saw someone else looking around too. The lights along the pontoon are all off and the lights of the clubhouse have gone out too.
Faced with an uncertain amount of time without power and the threat of cold weather soon I took the risk of heading into the marina, at almost the bottom of the tide, in the dark.
I was lucky to have the help of the grumpy Frenchman who was visiting at the time. HE stood and guided me in the narrow dark channel to the marina.
Mooring up was fun. A lot of other boats had come into the marina for the winter and all the spaces I saw available just two days ago we re all gone.
Ticking over I eeked along closely to the boats as there wasnt a lot of water. Pulling level with a potential spot I eyed it up asked the grumpy crew member if it looked big enough to him, yes was the answer.
Ok, so er, I think I will just reverse in as there's not really room to swing round.
In the time it took reverse to engage I was practically resting alongside the moored boats, 90 degrees away from being in the right angle for reversing into the mooring.
What a tit.
SO crew jumped off to fend us off the other boats, but dropped the stern line in the process, meaning I couldnt use the engine until it was retrieved.
In the mean time, crew man is looking worried. I say, hey its no problem we arent hurting anything, just take your time, dont rush all with be fine, but then he says, yes, but have you seen that>>> points to the massive bow sprit of a boat just off my bow. SHIT! I dont want to hit that. it belongs to one of the guys who works in the marina.
a quick bit of reversing and rope throwing, somehow we manage to man handle Varekai into a tight mooring spot. just a foot to spare between me and the neighbours boat.

Still, its in and snugly tucked up and I think reversing in will be an advantage with the way the wind blows most of the time around here.

02 December 2011


The funny thing about this time of year is just how changeable the weather can be.
I awoke to this

but came home to this

and then spent the next hour re attaching, re roping and then fitting these